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Woman Laws!

We often hear stories about the infamous man laws… So I think its time the ladies get a reminder of our rules. Here it goes:

1. Never, ever ask to another woman to use her lip gloss, lipstick, chapstick or anything that has to do with lips. We don’t know where each other’s lips have been. Truly, we don’t.

2. We often go to the bathroom in packs, no problem. And we usually chat while at the sink or in the mirror. However, once you hit the stall, everyone cease the chatter until you come out of there. Trying to flush and hear you at the same time is annoying.

3. If someone has on a cute item; shoes, purse, coat, etc., it’s perfectly fine to ask where it came from. Now, if/when you go to purchase said item, DO NOT wear it in the company of the woman who had it first. That’s just rude. Wear it with an entirely separate group of friends.

4. Speaking of shopping…. When shopping with each other, tell the truth about what looks good & what doesn’t. There are nice clothes for every body type. Don’t let us leave the store with something we look a hot mess in.

5. Bringing a hubby/boyfriend to officially scheduled “Ladies Time” is unacceptable. You will get the side eye. You already know we have stuff to talk about, and that usually includes them.

6. It is perfectly ok for us to do things alone. Your BFF/Friend/Ace-Boon-Coon doesn’t need to alert you every time she goes somewhere. She really doesn’t.

7. A woman must never let her any of her female entourage leave with a man she just met that night.  For safety reasons, he should also be required to provide: 2 forms of government issued ID, his resume, 3 professional references and one family member to be held as collateral if he wants to take her away. Besides, you shouldn’t be going anywhere with a man you just met, unless he has an equal amount of cute cousins, brothers or friends that will entertain all of us at the same time 🙂

8. There are times when a woman will flake on our friends for a date. This is understandable. Just don’t ignore your calls/texts, then give some lame excuse way after the fact. Put your big girl panties on and just tell the truth right away. Believe me, we get it.

9. When a woman complains incessantly to her girlfriends about the man she is dating, complete with tears and 5 hours conversations, do not expect your girls to fully accept and love said dude with open arms just because you’ve forgiven and forgotten. We haven’t.

10. Pay compliments. If a woman looks good, its nice to just tell her. It costs nothing to pay a compliment. We all need a confidence boost every now and then, but don’t lie to her, then snicker behind her back. That is just wrong.

**Bonus Woman Law: When a woman shows you a picture on her phone &  hands it to you, do not take it upon yourself to start scrolling through her pictures… you may see something you aren’t quite ready for….

What are some of your woman laws? Please share!

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4 comments on “Woman Laws!

  1. I'm taking a nap
    March 26, 2012

    AWESOME list!

    Also adding:
    NEVER steal your friends boyfriend/hubby. Nuff said

    Try not to date my ex ANYTHING for at LEAST 6 months after my breakup with them. Just plain respectful.

    If I find out you’ve told me I look good in something and I really don’t, I WILL get mad and you WILL know I’m mad. Get over it.

    If you don’t want to know my opinion, don’t ask. This goes for guys, clothing, makeup, pets, religion or politics. The last two are forgivable IF it’s an intelligent conversation. Sometimes.

    When we are PMSing is the ONLY time we are allowed to NOT share our chocolate. Bring enough for everyone otherwise. Or stay home. We’ll understand, trust me.

    Like

  2. Toiah
    March 26, 2012

    Thank you for these. Excellent! Some things just go without saying. Thanks for visiting. Come back often!

    Like

  3. Toiah
    March 26, 2012

    Here are more courtesy of Jasmine at http://www.sojasmine.com!

    Do not ask another woman if her hair is hers in public.

    Do not rake your fingers through another woman’s hair without her permission.

    Do not give your friend’s number out without asking her if it’s okay first.

    Do not ask another woman’s husband for sex-related advice.

    Do not discuss your sex life or genitals in front of another woman’s husband.

    Do not ask what kind of birth control a woman uses unless the conversation is relevant and she has opened the door for the question.

    Do not call your friend’s husband by her private pet name for him.

    Like

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This entry was posted on March 26, 2012 by in **Shenanigans** There is truth in humor...., Everything you want and tagged , , .
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